Why do you think you’d make a great foster/adoptive parent?
I mulled the question over in my mind as we were asked it from our resource worker, Heather. Honestly…why? Not because you’re a great person, a good Christian, etc. But why would Jason & Wendy Cox be great parents to someone that has none?
The question breaks my heart. I’ll explain below.
First off, back to the question at hand.
I know, in my heart, that we’d make great foster/adoptive parents. (Keep in mind, we were originally going into this just to adopt.) We were called to do this by God. He place it on our hearts three years ago when we watched our second son slip away. We sat on the thought, pondered it and prayed about it until the time was perfect. In God’s time…not our time. Deep inside of us, we have generous hearts, gentle and kind. We enjoy life. We laugh. We hug. And we love beyond any words. We have Elijah. A great young man that will be a great mentor to a younger child or two. We have a wonderful family, both immediate and extended. We have a fantastic array of parents, siblings, grandmothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews that we treasure. We have a church family that has exceeded our expectations. We look forward to the time we spend with them and in God’s house. We never take one second for granted where that’s concerned. Tangibly, we have a great home, 86 acres of beautiful country that we were blessed with, and we are financially stable. We have a good foundation to build a solid family. We are thankful and grateful for everything in and around our lives. We have our health. We have jobs.
The reason this breaks my heart? As I look at this list, I realize I don’t have anything above and beyond 80% of the people I know, but yet, we don’t think twice about the children out that there that have absolutely NOTHING.
After sitting through 27 hours of mandated state-training, we’ve heard the bad stories - the heartbreaking stories. We’ve heard what they can be like, how they can talk, how they may treat us - sometimes from the kid’s own mouth, but yet, how they treat us isn’t anything compared to how they’ve been treated.
The thought buried itself deep in my mind as I heard that they may call us bad names, they may scream, they may cry…..but it’s not anything compared to the beatings they’ve endured, the starvation, the cigarette burns on their arms and legs, the abandonment by the people they are taught to trust the most, and not to mention, they have no clothes or toys. A child should never have to face the situations these kids face each day.
I can’t wait to hug the one (or two or three or four) that come into our home. Heather smiles, “They may push you away.” And I’ll come back with another hug. I will be compassionate and understanding. I know heartbreak but I also know how great life can be, how great our life is and how blessed we are to be able to share it with an innocent child that has been robbed of their childhood.
A child should be just a child. My heart breaks for the children that are not allowed that luxury.
