August 6, 2009
At 12:14 this morning, three years ago, I cuddled my little baby boy for the first time. Tears streamed down my face, as I kissed his cheeks and spoke softly to him. It didn’t take much time. I was holding him by midnight and he was gone 14 minutes later. He took his last deep breath and that was it. It was serene and quiet.
“God needed Jonah. In time, we might heal and the days will become less painful, but I'll never forget the 2 1/2 weeks I spent with the strongest little boy I've ever met. He went peacefully in my arms just after midnight this morning. He went on his own without us making any decisions for him. I'll never forget Dr. Brian Eble's comforting words to us - "When it's Jonah's time, God will take him, regardless of the machines or the medication." And God did. He didn't put that burden on us. I held him for a short amount of time, until my grief overcame me and I asked Dr. Eble to take him. Dr. Eble whispered "It's okay. Jonah's gone now." We find comfort knowing that his suffering is over and that he is safe in the Lord's arms. This was not for us to understand but we were blessed to have Jonah in our lives - even if it was too short. We will never forget our beautiful baby boy.”
I was surprised at how quickly it all unfolded. One minute, we were laughing and enjoying the miracle that had happened…the next, we were kissing him goodbye. For all it’s worth, the DNR didn’t matter. Dr. Eble tried to help him, tried to save him and it didn’t work. He was leaving us, regardless. I felt like the family was robbed of saying goodbye to him but maybe that’s why we were given the day before. The good day. The calm before the storm. Everyone left that evening so happy and joyful for what had transpired that day. Jonah left everyone feeling happy that day. He showed us what miracles consisted of. His life didn’t turn out the way we would have chosen but each day of his life was a true miracle.
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